Friday, May 29, 2015
I've never blogged about my back. i have scoliosis. i got diagnosed with the disorder when i was 13 years old right in the middle of my parents divorce. i have tons of complications from it that are as corrected as we can get them. having a bad back meant i had to re-learn a lot of things. i mean i had to be able to live with it. I'm able to: play sports, go up stairs, run, carry things, push and pull things. just because things are difficult doesn't mean they are impossible. that's how i see things. luckily i was able to be in society since my family helped me with a lot of things. i normally modify everything but i can use what i have to my advantage a lot of the time. people with scoliosis also have hypermobility. it means they are extra flexable so they can be better dancers.
i LOVE LOVE LOVE line dancing. i do it as often as i can since i love it. nobody has a passion for it but me in my family. my brothers make fun of me for doing stuff but line dancing... I'm not so sure they make fun of me for that. my favorite is the cotton eyed Joe and the cupid shuffle.
last summer i decided to skive off Starbucks. I'm going to try doing that again. I'm gonna try not eating so many donuts as well. the reason i did that last summer was because I'm trying to lose weight. i did it in a way to lose weight. i haven't had a doughnut in a while. the reason I'm trying to lose weight was because I'm tying to get rid of my diabetes. my Starbucks consumption was a lot especially since it was to help WITH my diabetes. because of not going to Dunkin donuts and Starbucks as often as well as exorcizing more I'm feeling better. I'm not necessarily gonna lose weight but I'm feeling better since I'm not eating as much. I'm wondering if i don't eat as much i wonder if i should continue this. I'm walking faster, going up stairs and generally not feeling as tired.
#IWalkedADayInYourShoesAnd didn't use any big words. Didn't want to scare away your base.; #IWalkedADayInYOURshoesAnd I thought I smelt barbeque too....; #IWalkedADayInYourShoesAnd I kept ending up at my home.; #IWalkedADayInYOURshoesAnd should have picked someone with bigger feet.
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Most likely to find weapons of mass destruction. #WorstYearbookSuperlative; #WorstYearbookSuperlative Most Likely to be Annoyed at your very existence.; Most Likely to Impersonate an Eraser..... #WorstYearbookSuperlative; "Most Likely to be in Nickelback." #WorstYearbookSuperlative; Most likely to serve country in several hashtag wars #WorstYearbookSuperlative; #WorstYearbookSuperlative Most likely to play the worst Batman ever...
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
#ItsAGoodMorningBecause That is the way that I wish to see it; #ItsAGoodMorningBecause I woke up READY to take on the day; #ItsAGoodMorningBecause um, coffee? Obvi.; #ItsAGoodMorningBecause we are young & free... This is now and the possibilities are endless; #ItsAGoodMorningBecause I already had my coffee.; #ItsAGoodMorningBecause We Are Doing, Not Dreaming It's The Difference Between Failure & Success #GrindDaily; #ItsAGoodMorningBecause Wednesday is closer to Friday than Tuesday.
*Niall writing to his girlfriend* "I'm in love of my hat" and all his little things #Replace1DSongsWithNiallsHat; #Replace1DSongsWithNiallsHat Better than Niall's hat; #Replace1DSongsWithNiallsHat" is worldwide trend right now!; WHEN THE BOYS SEE #Replace1DSongsWithNiallsHat; NIALL: EVERYBODY WANNA STEAL MY HAT EVERYBODY WANNA TAKE IT ALL AWAY #Replace1DSongsWithNiallsHat
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
my "me time" WAS forensic science but since my brothers watch it my "me time" is the 2 or 3 hours after class since i need to a) study and 2) so i can be alone from the boys (my brothers) in the college campus. the reason i need the "me time" is because I'm always with my siblings so i need some alone time. i rarely have the boys watch horror movies since I'm the only one who likes it.
Concerts all day every day. #MySummerin5Words Pic via @nsnyder88; #MySummerin5words investing efforts into the garden; Summer drink prices, including Freezoni. #MySummerin5words #QTSummer; #MySummerin5words: Wayback, Wayback, Wayback, Wayback........and Wayback; I originally misread #MySummerin5words as #MySummerinSwords, which sounded a lot more interesting.; #MySummerin5words Tweet about heat from inside; It's always Summer in Florida #MySummerIn5words; Beer is making me fat. #MySummerin5words
#MakeAMovieLazy Harry Potter and the series-he's-been-binge-watching-on-Netflix-for-twelve-days-in-bed.; Guardians of the Strip Mall #MakeAMovieLazy; Star wars 3: revenge of the couch potato #MakeAMovieLazy; Dude, Where's My Car Keys? (Oh, they're over there. Meh. I'll stay home today.) #MakeAMovieLazy; Captain Sleepy: TheWinter Dream #MakeAMovieLazy; #MakeAMovieLazy "The Nodfather"
Monday, May 25, 2015
#YouWontHearMeSay One Direction have done more for music than The Beatles.; #YouWontHearMeSay Hey pop in that Kanye West cd.; Just get a six pack, twelve's too many. #YouWontHearMeSay; #YouWontHearMeSay yes or no to your request for new fries because yours are cold. That's my 16-year-old boss's decision.; #YouWontHearMeSay "No, I don't want another beer."; #YouWontHearMeSay anything bad about other people, there's no point! And it only makes me look bad. #MondayMarch; #YouWontHearMeSay Thanks for that automatic, self-promoting DM. I'm checking out your YouTube video right now...; #YouWontHearMeSay "Put something nice on, I've made dinner reservations at Taco Bell."; #YouWontHearMeSay Hollywood should totally keep remaking movies from my youth. It's not heartbreaking at all.; #YouWontHearMeSay "I have too many books."
when i was a sophomore in high school my mom made me give Christmas gifts to the teachers. i was carrying a HUGE bag over my 1 shoulder. twice i got called "Santa" or "Santa's helper". i don't remember what i was carrying in the bag other than the gifts but i think it was my jacket and a reindeer.
this breaks my heart 😞💔 #RIPGrandmaSepi; #RIPGrandmaSepi always in this fandom's heart 🌺💚🌺; Omg, no this can't be Im so sorry to the Hansen family. This is so tragic. Our prayers are with you 💗 #RIPGrandmaSepi; Stay strong Hanssen Family ♥️ we love you #RIPGrandmaSepi; my condolences to your family @dinahjane97 stay strong angel, harmonizers loves you #RIPGrandmaSepi
Sunday, May 24, 2015
once when I was at the MC bus stop waiting for a bus to a station, I ran into my ASL teacher. he was signing what bus number I was taking. I guess he wanted a companion to ride with. not that I'm opposed to that. its just he's older than I am. I was 19-ish. he was.... 30-something. If it was an outsider it would've looked weird.
this past December I wore a dress twice in the same month. this is unintentional. the 1st time I was going to a concert held at NWHS. the 2nd time I was going to get pictures taken so I had to get my red "Carrie" dress I wore for a picture. did I mention hating my picture being taken? also my brothers concert on my last day of classes. so I was freaking tired
I HATE getting my picture taken now a days. when I was younger.... I kind of liked it. now its annoying. when I was a senior I had my picture taken so often it was annoying. when I came in late to class once I had to say I was having my picture taken. people went nuts over that. I had to leave class early in order to have a picture taken. senior pictures were somewhat good since I wasn't being singled out. when a teacher SAW a picture I was nervous but it was a picture the school had taken. I was like "picture? what picture?"
when I was doing my pre-prom shopping I couldn't resist splurging on something personal. it was on clearance so I got a new clutch. I could hold almost everything I needed in it. it was so cute. it was a fake alligator skin wallet/ clutch. I loved it. it went with almost everything. who can resist buying themselves something if you got enough money?
one thing I have to learn with my diabetes is I can't be scared. so when I got a clutch my best friend suggested I carry my meter in a fanny pack but I thought why am I carrying a fanny pack AND a clutch? stupid. so I attached my meter to a thing that I used to carry my phone with. so now I can carry my meter on my wrist. not as embarrassing but still.
there was a little baby I used to work with. she used to push around another baby. she was SO cute and adorable it was kind of like, "she is SO cute but she did push another kid around so I'm torn." most of us are scared of those 2 walking around on the playground since they are VERY young and therefore VERY small. its SO cute to see them play
let me be clear: I am a girl. I LIKE being a girl. I am NOT an FtM but I LOVE the style of being an FtM meaning having a lazy and "rolled out of bed head". I grew up with 3 brothers and therefore have a tomboy-ish style to me. I rarely wear heels but I have a reason: I have scoliosis and so I have odd feet. I have 1 foot that's flat and 1 that's arched.
Sad, #ABeautifulMind #JohnNash died in a car accident. His equilibrium, a truly original idea!; Condolences to the family of John and Alicia Nash. He was truly a kind and brilliant person. They will be missed. #ABeautifulMind; #ABeautifulMind coming across the sociological term Queer Theory,..the cinematic re-invisioning of John F. Nash would be a strong argument,.
I've only owned 2 bikinis in my life. I don't like wearing them since I have weird marks on my tummy. I prefer tankinis. I WISH I could wear regular 1 piece bathing suits. I have a back issue which makes my ribs weird so I need a modified swim suits or tankinis. I told my best friend that she should take advantage of wearing 1 pieces since she CAN wear them
I know playing with babies is easy. i love playing with them. i taught 1 how to do a "big hand shake" which is a formal handshake. but after 5 hours of chasing 20 kids playing with 6 babies is hard since I'm tired. playing with babies are easy but try playing with 2 babies at the same time. they both wanted to play and sit on my lap at the same time. try having that after 5 hours.
once i said, "hang on let me tie your shoe. hang on let me tie your shoe. hang on let me..." when i was saying that he kept crawling away. unfortunately, the last time i said it he bumped into something hard. the teachers held him and i threw his shoe in the bench. he was a little Jackie's boy and was crawling away to get my attention. that got EVERYBODY'S attention.
You know those #TheHobbit movies? Totally based on a true story! #ThatsAnOutrightLie; Air stewardess: "We hope you liked our service as much we loved serving you”, Now #ThatsAnOutrightLie. Just GTFO the plane is what they mean; God spoke to one illiterate businessman in the Arabian peninsula three times through an archangel. #ThatsAnOutrightLie; God created the universe in 6 days. #ThatsAnOutrightLie; The best thing about ISIS is their love of cultural antiquities and history #ThatsAnOutrightLie; The guy sitting on the other side of my girlfriend at the show tonight didn't fart once and totally bathed #ThatsAnOutrightLie
Saturday, May 23, 2015
I'm a hoarder. i have WAY too many lip balms for my own good. i have 9 lip balms. who needs that many? i also have 2 mascaras. not too many. since i have my make up in my handbag its nice. i now have 20 rubber wristbands. can't believe how many people have 20 wristbands? i collect things and rarely throw things out. not sure why. its just what I do. I also hoard: purses, shoes, clothes, makes up, sweatshirts. almost everything. i have SO much nail polish its not even funny. i have an entire box devoted to nail polish. it's also pretty amazing how much make up i have. i have tons
i don't like meat that often but i do eat it on occasion. i like steamed veggies. i LOVE salads and veggie burgers. i don't consider myself a vegetarian or a vegan since i eat meat. because i have diabetes i should eat vegetarian diet but not always. I'm into my vegetarian diet. i also need meat since i need iron. i have tons of fiber in my diet since i need it to lose weight.
i went to get my prom dress one day after a game. when we did that i also got: earrings and shoes. i HATED shopping. I'd rather not buy things for something as silly (i went anti-promzilla) as prom. later i went on a shopping spree. mom gave me the equivalent of a movie ticket for some fun. i also had to buy whatever i could to complete a Prom outfit. man was it fun. i gotten enough to have fun AND completed my prom outfit. the accessories I had was: earrings, necklace, bracelet and matching shoes. people don't understand why I wore those since I was a girl but it wasn't my decision. my mom made that for me and the guy I went with. course I got something for myself. who can resist buying something for themselves?
#WhenIDieImComingBackAs Harry Connick Jr.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs This Little Guy.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs Beavis... so I can hang out with Butthead all day.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs.... A "weatherman", what other job can you "consistently" be "wrong" at and still get paid..; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs the ghost of marijuana.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs Fleshlight....i mean flashlight....i mean....; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs A Verified Account on Twitter; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs pills. So women will have no choice but to swallow me.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs the right shark because the left shark is a retard.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs a Marvel movie character. I will never really be dead.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs Morgan Freeman's voice.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs a dorky nerd who loves to hashtag and makes poop jokes... Wait.... That might be now.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs that guy; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs someone that doesn't look like the dude on the cover of this book...; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs Scarlett Johansson's endless supply of toilet paper.; #WhenIDieImComingBackAs a pug. At the least I'll probably get more action this way.
Thursday, May 21, 2015
@lakeslandlord #TakeAMovieToBreakfast live and let fry; The Hash-brown Of The Baskervilles #TakeAMovieToBreakfast; #TakeAMovieToBreakfast Great Eggsanbacons; Die Hard Boiled Egg #TakeAMovieToBreakfast; Lox, Stock, and Two Toasted Bagels #TakeAMovieToBreakfast;
Monday, May 18, 2015
i like listening to the song, "who i am". mostly so i can say, "who i am". when i get dressed i feel its easier being an FTM style. by that i mean: tank top/ camisole/ lose fitting top, jeans or shorts. clothes that are comfy but nice. i like being a girl but my life is so crazy i prefer being intersex. as a teenager i did enjoy dressing up as a boy.
#YoureNotFunToBeWithIf you enjoy the Big Bang theory. I just cannot.; #YoureNotFunToBeWithIf you don't understand multisyllabic words, sarcasm, puns, or any combination thereof.; #YoureNotFunToBeWithIf you don't flamboyantly air guitar every time Sweet Child O' Mine comes on.; #YoureNotFunToBeWithIf all you do is talk about bur#YoureNotFunToBeWithIf you don't like going shoe shopping.ning man.; #YoureNotFunToBeWithIf you're still not over the Tuck Rule.; #YoureNotFunToBeWithIf singing old hymns & crafts fairs are 'energizing'.; #YoureNoFunToBeWithIf you hate the big bang theory
Pee Wee Hermans #RejectedBikerGangNames; The Singing Mufflers. Those guys have some real pipes! #RejectedBikerGangNames; The Mild Ones #RejectedBikerGangNames; Riders for Joyce Meyer #RejectedBikerGangNames; #RejectedBikerGangNames Sons of Matriarchy; Riders for Joyce Meyer #RejectedBikerGangNames; The Ballsacks #RejectedBikerGangNames; The Duggar children #RejectedBikerGangNames
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
My grandma found my brother and I sitting in her basement in our underwear, playing strip Disney Yahtzee. She never said a word. #IGotBusted; #IGotBusted doing the naughty with a hottie in a porta-potty; Sent an IM to someone at work and decided I needed to delete it, so went to his desk to delete IM as he walks in to his office. #IGotBusted; #IGotBusted in kindergarten having sword fights in path room. We all smelled like pee and we were wet, all five got paddled by our teacher; #IGotBusted setting my pubes on fire. On the bright side, it led to a much-needed explanation of what No-shave November was about; I was picking my nose on the freeway. Apparently my friend saw me because when when I got home she posted about it on facebook. #IGotBusted
After 46 minutes, constant errors and refreshing, and a lot of frustration, I finally have #NYCC tickets.; Five crashes later and they don't even take me back to the virtual queue anymore. #NYCC I AM DISAPPOINT... #NYCCTix; I Survived The #NYCC Ticket Queue And All I Got Was This Crappy T-Shirt* *four four-day passes
I Want Your XM #TrafficASong; Dream Weaving #TrafficASong; Can't Get You Outta My Head-On Collision #TrafficASong; Back That Gas Up #TrafficASong @HashtagShenani; For Whom the Bridge Tolls #TrafficASong; Oops! I Hit it Again @HashtagShenani #TrafficASong; Yes I like Pina Colada, Driving Drunk in the Rain.... #TrafficASong; Help Me Honda @HashtagShenani #TrafficASong; Don't Worry Beep Happy #TrafficASong; Smells Like Teen Drivers #TrafficASong; Somebody That I Used To Tow #TrafficASong; Stuck up the middle for you #TrafficASong; Sunday Bloody Sunday drivers #TrafficASong
How my 'random idea' led to a One Direction single, nearly http://bbc.in/1KJ9Ifv #WeWantNoControlAsASingle; WE TOOK OVER BILLBOARD WE TOOK OVER TUMBLR WE TOOK OVER TWITTER WE RUN THE WORLD #WeWantNoControlAsASingle; THE ONE DIRECTION FANDOM SHOULD BECOME THE BOYS' NEW MANAGEMENT BC WE SLAY #WeWantNoControlAsASingle; *At the late late show* - 'So tell me about your new single' - The boys : what? Fandom: #WeWantNoControlAsASingle; Niall represents the whole fanbase towards Louis #WeWantNoControlAsASingle
Monday, May 11, 2015
everyone has mementos. my mementos from the place i work at are my shirts. they are going right in my "junk basket" or in the bottom of my dresser never to be seen or worn again. i still have mementos from the allied sports. i also have memento from NWHS, child development and girl scouts. they make good clothing. especially if you wear the same thing EVERY DAY.
hi camila! i hope you had a nice day :) i love you so bloody much! can you please follow me? 💓 @camilacabello97 #camilabananaicecream; dont ignore me @camilacabello97 PLEASE CAMZ FOLLOW ME. YOU'RE THE WORLD TO ME. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. PLEEEASE #camilabananaicecream; #camilabananaicecream PLEASE MILA😭😭💜💜 I've been wanting you're follow for so long 😭 please make my day 🙏💗 I love you @camilacabello97 30
is it good to lie if it means an easier life? Adam in Degrassi thought it would be easier if he stayed as Gracie. its heartbreaking to see him self harm. i LOVE Clare in this episode. she says if Gracie isn't who he truly is than he can be Adam. Adam says, "it's hardest when I'm Gracie," and "if I'm going to get thru this he NEEDS him mom to see him as Adam." watch "My body is a cage" the 2 part episode
Excellent motivator that knows how to keep good employees from even thinking of leaving. #FakeResumeSkills; I can stare down any cat. #FakeResumeSkills; Opening a beer bottle with a piece of paper. #FakeResumeSkills; Excellent at writing small print between the lines #FakeResumeSkills; Sleeping Expert- Includes pillow selection, proper covers, and the ability to snore when needed. #FakeResumeSkills; I can provide fair and unbiased financial outlooks based on my tea leaf readings. #FakeResumeSkills; Spreadsheet expert. #FakeResumeSkills; Can stay awake for 8 straight hours most days #FakeResumeSkills
Exuding total calm and togetherness, while a storm of constant chaos rages within #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe Why you should be glad you didn't marry me.; How to recover awkwardly from tripping in heels #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; How to make the perfect macaroni cheese sauce. #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe How to kill a conversation; #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe difference between your and you're; How to make gunpowder. #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; How to avoid people and still be considered friendly. #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe Getting other people to do things for you while you look busy AF; the only thing I really offer is one direction knowledge #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; Damn! Get on your grind, not on your marks. It's not a competition, just responsibility.#MondayMotivation #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; How to waste time. #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe; #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe How to dispose of a body using only bleach, toilet tissue, scissors & the cover of your nephew's bar mitzvah; How to act like a child forever n ever, amen. #ThingsThatYouCouldLearnFromMe
P.I.S.S. #UnpopularRockBands; Lighting Head #UnpopularRockBands; #UnpopularRockBands Rage Against The Coke machine; #UnpopularRockBands Bring me the empire, Crown the Horizon, Fallout Mice, Of Boys & Men. And one direction; Trolling Stones #UnpopularRockBands; ZZ Muffin Top #UnpopularRockBands; Grandma Florence And The Answering machine #UnpopularRockBands; Rage Against Florence and the Machine #UnpopularRockBands; One Direction #UnpopularRockBands; #UnpopularRockBands Nickelbackstreet Boys II Men; #UnpopularRockBands Nickelback. Any other answer is just not being honest.; Chronicles of Nirvana #UnpopularRockBands; Blue's Clues Traveler #UnpopularRockBands; Motley Crue-Neck Sweater #UnpopularRockBands; Twisted Hipster #UnpopularRockBands; #UnpopularRockBands AD ⚡️ HD; Third Eye Watches When You Sleep #UnpopularRockBands; "Huey, Dewey, Louie and the News" #UnpopularRockBands; AB⚡️CD #UnpopularRockBands; #UnpopularRockBands Breaking Bad Benjamin; Obamacare #UnpopularRockBands;
Sunday, May 10, 2015
Rick Murray is a Degrassi character whose story touches my heart and it comes very close to my own life. he was the victim of severe bullying. i was as well but i wasn't one to get revenge like Rick did. he unfortunately brought his fathers gun to school and was gonna kill the people responsible as well as others who he thought wronged him. Rick shot an innocent bystander who stood up for Rick. Rick died but he resolved almost all of his conflicts before he died. Rick only made 1 friend while at Degrassi. you need more than 1 friend apparently. RIP Rick. if you were real, I'd be your friend
Muchi and Alexis got the best #DoesYourMotherKnow tweets. No chill; #DoesYourMotherKnow you texted her for the screenshot?; "@gathukimundu: #DoesYourMotherKnow these are the kind of pictures you take because you are a vegetarian?"; #DoesYourMotherKnow you failed all your exams for last semester?; #DoesYourMotherKnow that you'd beat up anyone who tries trash talk about her without second thoughts?; #DoesYourMotherKnow you are busy tweeting about her to please internet strangers, while in real life you cant text or call her?!; #DoesYourMotherKnow You Opened legs for English Marks?; #DoesYourMotherKnow that exams start tomorrow and u busy tweetin yr head off about her.... Soma ebitabo kisilu gwe?; #DoesYourMotherKnow you know CGPA in full as Ciroc Guiness Pilsner Alvaro?; #DoesYourMotherKnow you struggle to pose like this when taking selfies?; #DoesYourMotherKnow you took an HIV test and passed?
#OhNoNiall How did Niall Horan react to Liam Payne Louis Tomlinson prank? http://dlvr.it/9lLjMF; #OhNoNiall How did Niall Horan react to Liam Payne Louis Tomlinson prank? - Unreality TV http://dlvr.it/9lM10y; Still wanna see Niall's reaction though haha #OhNoNiall; "@Harrysoceanside: "We're working hard on the fifth album" #OhNoNiall " Pftt hahahaha
Saturday, May 9, 2015
#BringBackDerpingSince2011 #WeWantTheTallyBack my previous and current cases have the tally it contains memories; i'll still use my old 5sos merch, wtf new logo my balls, hearted eyes skull looks so childish smh #WeWantTheTallyBack; 5sos this is what belongs with you.... #WeWantTheTallyBack; Can management pay whoever has the tally copyrighted so we can get it back? #WeWantTheTallyBack; #WeWantTheTallyBack WAS JUST TRENDING OMFG; WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DRAW ON MY SCHOOL PAPERS NOW??! #WeWantTheTallyBack; I want to kill the new logo It's just so bad #WeWantTheTallyBack
#MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas not making sure I was dead.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas hiding that our our whole life was based on a Ponzi scheme till the cops kicked in the door & took her & dad away.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas teaching me that ignoring your problems makes them go away.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas getting me off the noose when I was trying to end it!!; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas Not letting me live in the basement; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas Watching Grease with me and inadvertently poking me in the eye while trying to cover them during the mooning scene.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas telling me Dad would someday come back from the store with that pack of cigarettes.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas installing a nanny-cam in my bedroom.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas making me think you were supposed to drink vodka with breakfast and then go shopping with dad's credit card.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas worrying too much about others and not thinking of herself often enough.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas telling James Bond her whole plan as she tried slowly killing him in a complex way.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas letting me do that commercial.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas forgetting to hide me better in pictures.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas getting me a cat when I was 11. I've been collecting them ever since.; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas leaving me home alone; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas telling me when I was 4-5 years old that men "only want one thing" - and telling me what that was; #MyMomsBiggestMistakeWas involving a guy impersonating a Nigerian prince in an email!
@BrutusWatts #FattenAMovie die lard; #FattenAMovie What About Bob Evans Restaurants?; How Stella Got extra Grooves in her Back #FattenAMovie; #FattenAMovie 'Glad-He-Ate-Her'; The Crepes of Wrath. #FattenAMovie; Moulin Huge #FattenAMovie; #FattenAMovie 'When Harry Ate Sally'; Muffin Top Gun #FattenAMovie; Don't Tell Mom The Babysitters Fed #FattenAMovie; #FattenAMovie Cast Jennifer Lawrence as the lead.; Battlefield Girth #FattenAMovie; Dude, Where's My Carbs? #FattenAMovie; The Bridges of Marzipan County #FattenAMovie; Powdered Donuts #FattenAMovie; A Night at the Opera Cake #FattenAMovie
No I am legally in love with you #FirstDateQuestions; "Are you a Harry Potter fan?" *Nods aggressively* "It was nice meeting you" #FirstDateQuestions; #FirstDateQuestions You dont talk much, do you?; Do you, by any chance, happen to have a twin sister... ? #firstdatequestions; And who is your fav serialkiller? #FirstDateQuestions; #FirstDateQuestions 'which football team do you support'; What do you do for fun? #FirstDateQuestions
Friday, May 8, 2015
Bones Thugs-N-Palpatine #StarWarsRapNames; Straight Outta Tha Death Star #StarWarsRapNames; Wiz Calrissian #StarWarsRapNames; Kool C and DJ Solo #StarWarsRapNames; Lord Vader & Peter Gunz #StarWarsRapNames; Eazy-ET #StarWarsRapNames #hewasinTPM; #StarWarsRapNames EminEMPIRE strikes back; Remember YodaMTV Raps? #StarWarsRapNames; DJ Tatooweeny #StarWarsRapNames; #StarWarsRapNames Qui Gon Jinn and Juice; New Sith on the Block #StarWarsRapNames
Wednesday, May 6, 2015
Nope, still don't agree with any of your life choices out here, either. #FutureTextsFromMom; Are you on pot? If so bring me some. #FutureTextsFromMom; Send your Aunt Pat a card since she doesn't have kids. So sad. I am glad she has a roommate to keep her company. #FutureTextsFromMom; #FutureTextsFromMom You're too busy to call me back? This is the thanks I get for giving birth to u after 26hrs of labor without an epidural; I found some old comic books in ur room so I threw them out. The plastic cases are a perfect fit for my lifestyle mags #FutureTextsFromMom; You need to get your brother a girlfriend so he can quit this gay nonsense. #FutureTextsFromMom #truestory; #FutureTextsFromMom I really didn't care if you gave me grandchildren I was just seeing if you were gay or not.; #FutureTextsFromMom Gave your number to this cute guy at bingo tonight. Yes he is older -- but you aren't getting any younger. Tick tock.; "Do they have husky jeans for women? I can't fit these damn skinny jeans". #FutureTextsFromMom; Why aren't you answering me? I thought this was suppose to be instant? #FutureTextsFromMom; Finally saw 'Jaws'. I now understand why u were always saying you needed a bigger boat. #FutureTextsFromMom; Why are you still wearing Velcro shoes? #FutureTextsFromMom; Your Father Would've so been proud of you ... Me not so much...... #FutureTextsFromMom; Ur brother just texted me. He texts me all the time. I can only assume you are still alive. #FutureTextsFromMom; What's Hashtagging? ARE YOU A DRUG DEALER???? #FutureTextsFromMom @HashtagShenani; So sorry dear, I thought WTF meant "Well That's Fantastic!" #FutureTextsFromMom; I'm spring cleaning. Do you want your Strawberry Shortcake sheets from the 80's? #FutureTextsFromMom; Honey! Have you tried this texting thing? It's like a letter on your phone! #FutureTextsFromMom @HashtagShenani; #FutureTextsFromMom Where's the damn remote?
Dropping out and selling drugs.. #collegein5words; ..do they have free food? #collegein5words; Maybe when I sober up #collegein5words; #collegein5words should I shower or sleep; #collegein5words need to marry someone rich; No alcohol, pls go away. #collegein5words; I Need A Coffee IV #collegein5words; I Hope There's A Curve #collegein5words; #collegein5words Skipping Class To Sleep In
I hate seeing kids that cant eat because of city destruction! smh http://www.gofundme.com/tw88z8zf7 #cincodemayo #RedThumb #collegein5words #baltimore; Mi amooor @adamlevine #RedThumb; @PurePursuitAuto is taking the #RedThumb promise, are you?; @adamlevine and @NissanUSA urge you to make the #RedThumb promise. And post/tag yourself doing it.; “As silly as it sounds, it totally worked” - Steve Babcock, Founder of #RedThumb Reminder Take the pledge to put phone down while driving
Monday, May 4, 2015
i remembered 1 of my former teachers was in a band and they were staying at a hotel. this couple comes out and my teacher was holding a pizza box and offers them. the woman asks why a terrorist is holding a pizza box. her husband explained that she as drunk and apologized.
#ItsNotGoingWellWhen your religion needs Tom Cruise to explain the aliens; #ItsNotGoingWellWhen your entire self-esteem depends on the number of intangible stars, retweets, or points you receive from strangers.; #ItsNotGoingWellWhen you automatically get the seniors' discount but you're only in your 40s; #ItsNotGoingWellWhen you notice powder in the bottom of your drink; #ItsNotGoingWellWhen you end up in Wichita sharing a hotel room with a complete stranger.; #ItsNotGoingWellWhen I found out the cart was not motorized.; #ItsNotGoingWellWhen when the Kurgan shows up.
Awesome stat - 57% of private work force - go SmallBiz #SmallBizForce; Happy #SmallBizForce to all our @smallbusinesses that we help support. Small business is our business, and we love doing all we can to help!; It's #NationalSmallBusinessWeek! Shop small biz this week! By supporting a small business, you're supporting your community! #SmallBizForce; Shoutout to all Small Businesses! Happy Small Biz Week #SmallBizForce; Small Business Week is a good reminder that America’s small businesses create nearly 2 out of every 3 new jobs in the U.S. #SmallBizForce